So I started reading this book; it was cheap on kindle and called 'why relationship first works'. Within the first 20 pages it has me gritting my teeth. He goes on and on about the wonders of join up, and how magical and awesome it is. Now I'm going to be honest and admit that I have never had the same rosy eyed view of join up that everyone else seems to. Oh, I'm sure it can work and does, but I don't think it's amazing or a super new concept.
No, this wasn't the story of how he bonded with a troubled horse, a wild horse or even a young horse. This was how he bonded with his first horse. It wouldn't bug me quite so much if he didn't keep saying how amazing it was that his horse 'chose' to be with him.
Okay, let's get something straight for a moment. Your horse did not *choose* to be with you. You put a halter on them, put them in an enclosed area with no corners to hide in and no way out and then controlled their movement and energy until he offered the behavior you wanted to see. You ran him until he got tired and offered to stand by you... you know, the place that he already was at. Earlier. Before you told him you were a predator- and guess what? He already knew that. Being an already fully trained and domesticated horse, he also knew you probably weren't going to eat him. Still, that horse did not suddenly choose you over freedom. It couldn't have because you never actually offered them freedom.
You want to impress me with them choosing you, do it in a 50 acre pasture. Then I'll be impressed. But that won't work you say? Because that way they can use their flight response and get away from the big, bad predator and they don't have to look for another option.
Exactly. You have already taken away the option of actually going away from you. The only choice the horse really has, is keep running until he drops- an illogical behavior since a horse is designed to keep an energy store in case he was attacked by different aggressive predator, or save their energy and come stand by you. That really isn't much of a choice. I guess the other choice is for the horse to become aggressive and attack you, but let's face it, that's not a very common reaction because horses put up with an amazing amount of crap from us.
Also, I'm sorry but your horse is domesticated and trained. What you're pretty much doing is lunging them until they ask if they can stop moving already and go back to where they were already standing. I don't believe that you have suddenly shown the horse that they can trust you. You've showed them you're the one in charge of moving their feet, so you're in control. But that they can trust your decision making skills? No way.
Why?
Because animals in the wild don't always simply go straight for the kill. Wolves will take turns running a horse down to exhaustion until they finally move in. That's why it bugs me when people say "oh, he understands that I'm not a predator because I'm driving him away from me!" No. He doesn't. Some animals can and do run horses until they give up or get injured because they don't want to pick a fight with those hooves any more than you do.
Also, he didn't learn that you weren't a predator because you ARE a predator. Human beings are a predatory species. There's no way around it and no discussion. We are and we will never not be. He learned you weren't out to eat him (probably) but he did not learn that you weren't a predator.
If you want your horse to trust your decision making skills, it's going to take time and experiences. Lots of them, that's how a real relationship works.
Of course I'm also one of those cynical people who's not impressed by the fact that you can take an unbroke horse and teach them how to be haltered, saddled and ridden in a half hour. That's very.... fast? Good for you? I don't think it's so great for the horse who probably can't actually understand or retain all that much because there's no way you're not skipping a good, solid foundation. You could probably teach a first grader some algebra after adding and subtracting but that doesn't mean you should.
I'm a fan of slow, steady steps where the horse is allowed to question things and understand what's going on. I mean, honestly, would you want to climb on a horse that'd been "broke" in an half hour the day before? If you do, you are a braver soul than I am.
Rant over.
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